Implicit memory allows us to perform ordinary physical tasks (like riding a bicycle) without conscious thought.  We learn by doing, riding the bicycle over and over again until we have mastered that skill.  

Current scientific studies suggests that implicit memory also governs the way that we communicate in our romantic relationships.  When we navigate conflict with our partners, we are using emotional patterns developed in early childhood, which we learned by watching our parents interact with each other.  Most of these communication skills are habitual and unconscious.  Our job in counseling is to identify these unconscious strategies, determine if they are effective, and learn additional options that might be more helpful in relationship.  

As a couples therapist, I am engaged and interactive, encouraging my clients to experiment with new ways of behaving and then determining what works best.  My strategies are based on recent scientific research in attachment theory and neuroscience, and I have advanced training in the field of interpersonal development.  The goal of couples therapy is to practice emotional intimacy in a safe setting until we have developed a set of skills that you can use at home.  We not only use our minds to gain insight into the nature of the problem, but we are also using our emotions to create new ways to connect with each other.